Conversation in sued... and I want to do so many things to you!

There are a few times in which you experience happiness in the field of emergency medicine and trauma; one of the few times was today. Today I delivered my third baby as a doctor; her name is Kelsey. She was born precisely at 11:23 am today and she was so cute. Of course, the reason why she was born with me is because she had to be difficult. The baby had a prolapsed cord, which means that the predisposing factor of the baby's birth was the umbilical cord. Usually (and of course, this case) the umbilical cord poses a threat to the baby's breathing because the baby's head or body will compress the cord, cutting of nutrients and oxygen. It’s not very difficult to treat; just an emergency caesarean section must be performed. Kelsey was born nice and healthy today!

So Caleigh and I got into our first real official giant fight... and I don't even have a clue what to do. We went out last night to a local bar/club to just relax and have some fun. We had a few drinks; we were feelin' pretty good until this chick walks up to me. She kisses me on the cheek in front of Caleigh and asks me when she's going to see me again. Of course, Caleigh gets upset and mad and storms off, after slapping me of course. I don't even know who this chick is and Caleigh thinks I've been cheating on her. Why do people do things like this? Do they get a kick out of it? I feel bad that Caleigh think's I'm going to cheat on her, but I never would. I'm so depressed because she hasn't returned my phone calls since then, and she hasn't been home. I wish she knew I had a blog so she could understand my frustration and my love for her, but I don't want her to know I talk about it online. It's just driving me crazy.

You Can Rest Assure, I'm Your Doctor

...I'm your cure. My day today started off pretty fantastic; we had a patient in my hands by seven. I wasn't fully awake until I saw "Bill's" brain protruding from the back of his head from the spinal cord area. Bill was previously undergoing periods where he would fall unconscious, become lucid, and lose consciousness repeatedly until the point where he no longer gained consciousness. The first step: drilling a hole directly through the patient’s skull. Brain protruding from the back of the skull without any significant injuries to the face is immediately ruled an intracranial Hematoma. A CAT scan later showed an Epidural Hematoma; it's when a main artery in the brain is torn and causes an immediate loss of consciousness. Bill smacked his head just the right way on a cabinet door; he had previously left a cabinet door open when he was cooking dinner. A small smack to the head is enough to cause major damage; Bill has a rare cause. Working with the neurologist we were able to stabilize Bill and bring him in for surgery where his brain was cleaned and reentered into his skull. Bill does not have much sensation and mostly paralysis in his arms and legs. We'll expect some eye sight loss as well, but we can't be too sure until he wakes back up, for now he's in the intensive care unit.

I've been dating a girl for five months now; I'm so head over heels for her that I don't know what to do with myself. She's been really quiet around me lately... and I think it's because my birthday is coming up next week. I'm turning the big 2-7. I'm going to be thirty soon, I'm freekin' scared for my life. I know we are going out to eat for my birthday but I will not underestimate Caleigh's slyness. Being a renascent doctor, I will not let her ostentatious manner fool me; or has it? The other night we decided to play a game to learn a bit more about each other, we played "I've never". We took out a set of shot glasses and filled them with some grade-A captain Morgan’s rum. We asked our series of questions... "I've never touched a liver...a dead guy...a heart" were amongst Caleigh's favorite questions, for she doesn't do trauma for a living. I can barely remember any of the questions we asked; I do remember Caleigh saying she's never been in a threesome... there's a first time for everything.

Oh, by the way... I created a facebook for my blog: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1337445956

Slightly Brusied & A Little Bit Used

Today we had patient, "Joe" who was working in a steel factory who was impaled in his left arm and abdomen by a steel bar. The steel bar performed a partial amputation to his left arm and completely ripped open his abdomen spilling his entrails. When he arrived to us he was in horrible shape; he had no blood pressure, and a weak pulse. After an extent of time and blood loss, you will no longer carry a blood pressure. Judging by his appearance, he lost about 1500-2000ccs of blood. To put this in perspective for you, one cup (8oz) is about 237ccs; which means he lost roughly 6-8 cups of blood. When he landed in our hands, or even before he left the site, an operating room was cleared for him. He was given a few blood transfusions and his insides were stitched and cleaned in an exhausting 9 hour surgery.

I'm not going to be able to post every night like I used to, but I will post frequently. So remember way back, when I told you Mandy kept popping up everywhere? Well, after my departure from the hospital, I still see her everywhere. It's driving me nuts. I caught her staring at Caleigh and me at the supermarket; its raising Caleigh's suspicion... she will kill. So I realized that Caleigh has been talking to her ex boyfriend quite a bit lately... and it's bothering me. I'm not sure what to do about it, I trust her completely, but I'm nervous. Is this normal or am I over thinking it? We've been going strong for almost five months... not even a fight in those five months. I think everything is fine, there is no reason why people can't be friends with their exes (ha. Mandy.) I think she’s pissed because I've become more adapt to showing some kind of emotion; I did what Paul told me to do to. Speaking of Paul, I recently paid off a huge chunk of my student loans with the money he left me. I also moved into a nice upscale condo in the city. It's quite contemporary; it has a chic stainless steel, glass, and very white decor. Caleigh moved in with me, and let me tell you I learned a few new things about her since this move in. One of them is that she is very OCD about how the apartment looks. Heaven forbid you forget to wash a glass (I'm not allowed to leave dirty cups or dishes in the sink) you'll be reprimanded (hey, I kind of like it). But I don't care, I love this new life.

It's The Same Old Blood Rush With a New Touch

My friends (if you still exist), I'm back... so to speak. I apologize for my absence; however, I have a good explanation for it. Three days after my last post (March 13th) I was involved in a pretty bad medical accident where I was injured and hospitalized. Some people may have heard about a horrible car pile up that occurred back in march, there were about 15 causalities; I was almost one of them. Well, depending on how bad an incident is, we may either deploy doctors and interns to the scene, or we await for patient arrival. In this scenario there was a team of about five doctors, a few nurses and a ton of paramedics. The new intern and I were deployed on scene to tag and treat as many patients as we could, and to send the critically wounded to the hospital. Nevertheless... I'm performing CPR on a patient with a ventilation mask... and the moron is using an defibrillator right next to me. Usually, and OF COURSE in this case, the ventilation mask has supplemental oxygen being fed into it. What will a defibrillator do? Create a spark strong enough to ignite the oxygen tank. I can barely remember any of the situation, what I do know was bits and pieces of what other people told me. I underwent rehab for six weeks after being comatose for two weeks. I underwent some heavy duty plastic surgery (got me those D cups I've always wanted) to fix the burns on my face and abdomen, which is looking better by the day. On top of my misfortune, I've still had miss Caliegh on my side, I love her to death. Nothing was better than having her at my side while I was undergoing treatment and surgery.
So I recently went back to work a few weeks ago and I've being dying to start posting again but I needed to let myself get a bit back on track before I began to post again. I missed reading blogs and talking to everyone, I hope you guys come back! So now I'm starting a new slate, and some new posts. Oh, and for those of you who were wondering - the patient receiving the oxygen inevitably did not get resuscitated, and the intern suffered burns, his patient also passed away.

Will Someone Please Call A Surgeon?

...Who can crack my ribs and repair this broken heart? Hey everyone! I'm sorry that I have been gone, I've had some computer trouble - I just went out and bought a brand new laptop. I could only check my mail at work - If I had time and I'm sorry I didn't get to all of your e-mails. I'm going to continue posting - everyday I have been writing down what happened so I could just backtrack and we'll all be caught up. I'm posting one tonight, but the rest I'll put up over the next few days, its been a while! (No hearts are broken by the way - just the song I'm listening to...)

Today was an extremely stressful and busy day. I only interned today and I think that running all over one of California's largest hospitals all day was tiring both mentally and physically. Today's most interesting case was an emergency amputation. Joseph, a 46-year-old teacher, was brought in originally by lifeline for care of extensive burns from a house fire. The problem with burn victims is that you have to stabilize them quickly before infection can spread. It took no time for Joseph’s burns to become infected and his right arm was horribly infected. In result, we had to perform an emergency amputation. The reason for an amputation is so that the infection dwelling in his arm will not spread through his body and infect it as a whole. Joseph was brought into the surgical unit where his arm was cleaned with an anti-septic solution, and then checked and compared with the healthy arm. The arm was then cut; for me it was hard to watch. Imagine laying there before you are put to sleep... knowing when you wake up... you will no longer have your arm again? Joseph cried before he was drugged into sleep, and I don't blame him, I would have done the same. The stump was sutured closed to avoid any further infection, and then he was sent off for plastic surgery to take care of the burns that covered the other 60% of his body.

Now, let me tell you about how drama is spicing up with Mandy. Mandy has become my official little stalker; she keeps popping up everywhere. I see her on my way to work, I'm pretty sure I've seen her at work, I see her when I'm out, she is everywhere. I haven't called her out on it because I think it's cute; she’s trying to keep that chest in the game. Too bad it’s not working for her (she needs another cup).

In Your Last Moments...

You are completely aware of your surroundings, you feel no pain, and you only have 30 minutes left of your life. Whom would you say goodbye to? Who would you spend your 30 minutes talking to? Why them? What makes them so significant in your life that you have to talk to them? What is going through their minds as they say goodbye? Are they scared, or are they strong? There are so many questions that we think about when in this situation... who would you call? Today Michael was told that he only had 30 minutes to live. He was diagnosed with a severe case of internal bleeding due to blunt trauma. The doctors knew there was no saving him because his case was so intense because the doctors knew he should have been dead already. He first called his children, then his wife, and then finally his parents. He told them his feelings and reassured them with an "I love you". His eyes were full of tears before he could speak a sentence. As his mind ran faster and faster, we watched him get tired and more tired. His fear for death became a reassurance of peace and prosperity. Within the 30 minutes, he completely changed. We went from fearing death to accepting fate and responsibility of the life cycle. He held off death for 45 minutes aided with his family.

On the contrary, of work, I met with Paul's lawyers today. Paul was a very nice man and we had a bond, but he was far too courteous for his own good. He left me one of his two $150,000 life insurance policies. That crazy man left me money. Not only did he leave me money, he left me a condo in the city. His other $150,000 life insurance policy he left to the local school to start a scholarship program for students entering the medical field. I don't want to take his money! Paul was an amazing guy but wow. He left me a note and I've typed it below for you to read:

Dear Beau,

Since the day I have met you... you have done nothing but be kind. You
are a living replica of me, my beliefs, and my thoughts. Now, you may live
with the hundreds of stories I have shared with you, and you can share them
with your child one day. I'm going to leave you a start to life. Having a family predecease me,
I'm leaving you my condo and one of my life insurance policies. Stay strong young doctor,
for you will change the world.

With love,
Paul

Again, I'm consumed with sadness, I did not expect this. I'm headed to bed.

Happy One-Month Anniversary!

Today is the 31st post I have made in my blog; I've been consistent for an entire month! I honestly didn't think I had it in myself to post something every single day... including those were I could barely make out the keys on the keyboard. I'm excited that I have made it this long and I'll continue to post.

So today was another interesting day,... we had another sexual problem case. We had a patient, Jon (Age 18) come in because he could not become flaccid. In order to relieve the problem, we had to insert a needle into his erection (poor guy) and draw the any blood to make it flaccid. Twenty minutes later, he was still flaccid so we deemed him okay to go home, but had to get further tests and scans done to make sure there were no other problems. He claimed he wasn't on any performance pills, so the blood tests will confirm if he was or not.

So today was extremely nice out and on my lunch break, I went for a little cruise in my car. I was able to take a little run around town in my car with my windows down. I met Caleigh at a local restaurant/deli and we had a small lunch. Other than Mr. My-Penis-Isn't-Going-Down-Jon, the day was pretty normal. We had another patient in today for an abdominal trauma, where he needed stitches on his left side. From what I heard fell down a flight of stairs while carrying a box of china into his basement... I doubt any of the china made it. His tests came back with kidney damage because he has hematuria (blood in urine).

I'm exhausted today; I barely got any sleep last night. I'm trying to pass out tonight so I can make it through tomorrow!

I Think Sex is Overrated, So is Always Getting Wasted

HA! Yeah, right... I actually do find happiness by the bottle. Today was a good day; it was pretty busy in the emergency room. Today I was stuck doing scut work. Scut work is those stupid little tasks that the residents and attendings send you on because they don't have the time for it. That includes filling out charts, collecting samples, drawing blood, and moving patients. The only case I actually got in on today was one with a toddler, "Seth", who was admitted for swallowing two magnets. The two magnets, connected magnetically inside his intestines, completely ripping the lining. This causes toxins and bacteria to leak into the body and can potentially kill the child. However, since we knew of the problem ahead of time we were able to put Seth on antibiotics and were able to surgically remove the magnets. Seth is nice and safe with his mother, and under surveillance for the rest of the week.

It seems lonely at the other hospital now, I don't have anyone to go visit.

Super Sunday!

Today has been an amazing day, I only worked two hours! The emergency room was actually so slow today they sent some technicians home. I was excited; it meant that I could relax! I came home and gave Caleigh a call, so we rented a movie to watch. We rented Good Luck Chuck; it was a pretty funny and good movie. I love Jessica Alba, she's gorgeous... I love her little penguin panties. On Thursday I have an appointment with Paul's Lawyer, supposedly he left me something in his will. I wonder what he left me, I'm somewhat excited, and I wasn't expecting him to leave anything for me. This is probably why he was so happy that day... I don't know. I'm writing out of boredom right now, sorry. Caleigh went home because she needs to work tomorrow early in the morning. I'm now watching the hunting channel... remembering the times I used to go hunting as a child with my father. It’s funny, isn't it? I went as a child to kill animals and now for a living I help people... who are shot. I'm sorry I have nothing neat or interesting to tell you. I'll share some old emergency room stories with you by genre.

Saddest: The saddest emergency room cases are between Emily from the post 3:32 PM, and a 6-year-old rape victim I had three years ago. That was really heard, the poor little girl was traumatized... people really need to still be careful of family friends, they really put a new meaning to friend.

Most Gruesome: There was one man who fell off the roof of a home he was working on, and landed on a cast iron rod that was cemented into the foundation. He fell on the rod in such an angle that it tore his complete abdomen to pieces. (He lived.)

Weirdest: There was one day when one of my colleagues kept telling us that he was going to have a pile up that day, and sure enough we did. We almost never have pile-ups... and that day we had 15 admitted.

Keep Your Chest In The Game

I worked another long Saturday in my old emergency room since I don't intern during the weekend. I worked to the usual four o'clock. Today we had Sarah, a 14-year-old girl who was drop kicked by her 15-year-old brother. She had cyanosis (blue color of the skin due to deoxygenized hemoglobin), a very low pulse, and Dyspnea (shortness of breath). What does Cyanosis, A low pulse, and Dyspnea have in common? She has a Haemothorax. It's when your thoracic cavity fills up with blood. The thorax can generally hold a good percentage of your blood, if left untreated you will essentially bleed to death. To aid her injury we performed a tube thorascotomy; this drained the blood from the thoracic cavity. After the draining of the cavity, the blood had already begun to clot from the rupture point. The on call surgeon had stitched it and admitted her into the hospital for surveillance. Guess who is going to be grounded?
Caleigh thought I needed to get out, so we double dated for the first time today. We went to a nice local restaurant/bar for a good night of fun. We went with her friends Jennifer and Dillon, they are pretty cool, we all had a good time. The place we went to was an outdoor authentic Mexican restaurant. Our rustic cast iron table was located under an enormous willow tree which semi-secluded the four of us from the rest of the diners (except for about two other tables). They had a live band that played all night with a small little dirt dance floor for those who wanted to enthuse themselves. Let’s just say after about six shots of Juarez Silver Tequila, I was out there! Oh, and to add to the drama, GUESS who showed up? Yes, you got it, Mandy (with some guy). She scoffed at me as I drew Caleigh closer with a light kiss on the neck... I know, I'm a horrible person. She did have the balls to approach us and tell Caleigh how much of an asshole I am. Caleigh literally laughed in her face, like... literally... in her face. As she walked away, I thought I should give Mandy some advice from Cute is what we Aim For. So, I yelled after her... Keep that chest in the game! She replied with a death stare. Caleigh, Dillon, and Jennifer are not Cute fans (they don't even know who they are) but they still found the comment funny. She'll have no problem dropping her jaw to coax or do you-know-what to someone. I can speak on experience there. After our little escapade, we decided to take the bus back to my apartment, where we all are in the process of crashing. Well, they crashed, and I'm here writing in my blog. We had a good time for the first time in a while! Anyway, that bed is calling me!

Adrenaline Carried One Last Thought to Fruition

I would like to look back on the post I made on February 18th titled 3:32 PM. I went back today at work to the hospital morgue (which is extremely creepy, might I add) to see Paul. A dead person is truly not the same as a person who is living. He laid there, so lifelike... I just waited to see if his chest would constrict and expand. That's where I found myself standing there, waiting for something that isn't going to happen. His gray-ashen face had lines of mysteriousness - was he the person of which he spoke of? His cold dark eyes stared blankly at the ceiling with the expression of attainment... attainment of freedom. He is probably so much happier now... now that he is free of loneliness and free of pain. I stood there with empathy for what felt like an hour, then I said my goodbye, and then for me to leave and never see him again. Thank you again Paul, for the lessons you taught me. Apart from visiting Paul for the last time, I started my interning in Orthopedics. I've come rather familiar with orthopedic practices mostly because the amount of bone injuries I have seen at the other hospital. Today we had an 18-year-old boy named "Kyle" come in with a dislocated knee; I was able to shift it back into position without the help of the resident. I hold a lot of credential due to the fact that I've worked in a hospital before. My experience blows away all these new interns and their medical-school-only knowledge. This is for real my friend, time to put those books aside and learn medicine.

When Darkness Turns To Light, It Ends Tonight.

I'm posting this rather early today because I left my intern work early today. Today was a very bad, a very depressing one to be more in-depth. I have been waiting for this day for the past few weeks and now my work means almost nothing to me. Today Paul finally passed on, and I was not there to say goodbye. I wanted to be there so badly that way he had someone there with him, so he wasn't so alone. I feel absolutely horrible... I feel like the worse person in the entire world. The day he told me that I was his family; his optimistic and loving personality consumed my life and ultimately, changed me. I have spent at least 30 minutes every single day in his room, and if I could afford more time, I would. I spent even my lunch breaks in his room. I hope that I at least affected his life in a way where he felt more comfortable. I'm in a very depressed mood tonight and I'm spending the night alone. I hope that I'll feel better tomorrow, I need to work... and I hate to think about school and work at times like this.

R.I.P. Paul
Born: 1-12-53
Died: 3-06-08
Aged: 55 Years

When the darkness turns to light, it ends tonight. Goodnight Paul. Thank you for the lessons you taught me.

You're Looking Quite Sharp, Sugar.

Days like yesterday give us emergency room workers a reason to come in the next day. There is nothing better than having a hilarious or easy-going day. And hey, it's not as if I’m making fun of the guy for coming in... He did the right thing; I don't want to deter people from going into the emergency room for sexual-related problems. But I do love my job... I love it so much until it comes to days like today. Today we had a patient completely code-out on us from use of street drugs.

"Jonathon" a 16-year-old child was admitted after overdosing on heroin. The boy isn't even out of childhood and he has overdosed on heroin. Things like this make me afraid to have children, and I want children so badly someday. To stabilize a drug addict we have to put them through detox. We use a drug called methadone, which is an opoid agonist; it will help block some of the withdrawal symptoms. There is a newer, more expensive way to be detoxed and that’s through anesthesia, which virtually removes the withdrawal symptoms; this method is extremely pricey and is an almost guaranteed no-go by insurances.


So, I have looked back and have seen my comments of which I have contradicted myself. I have committed to Caleigh, yes... and I have said I love you and meant it. Today, Caleigh is back up on her feet again. She isn't back to normal, but she has more functionality and is starting to get off her pain medications. Her chest has a tint of yellow (so attractive), from the fading bruise. Her left ankle was set in a cast the other day, and her sprained wrist, is well, healing. But back up on her feet, she was so excited to return to work. She is looking quite sharp! Too bad they don't have coach brand casts; otherwise, she would have liked to get her ankle fixed!

Caleigh is on her way over; we're going to pop in a DVD and watch a nice movie so we can relax. I'm personally excited.

And You're, You're... Addicted to the Drug of Lust

Today was an interesting day; we had probably one of the most interesting and funniest cases that I have ever seen. There is nothing more hilarious than when someone comes into the emergency room with a sex related trauma. I give them kudos for their ability to show their faces once their abnormal crazy fetish has gone wrong. However, there is still nothing funnier when you have a staff holding their breath to try to keep themselves from laughing.

So, on the discussion on the addiction of lust, we have "Aiden" a 22-year-old with a penile trauma. He complains that after the "incident" he was unable to urinate, and suffered acute pain and swelling. We asked him how he suffered from this trauma, since it clearly did happen today. He told us he "slipped" out during intercourse, and it caused the trauma. When someone suffers from blunt penile trauma, you hear a loud "crack" followed by the penis quickly becoming flaccid, and then becoming discolored and swelling. Ready to hear how Aiden really got blunt penile trauma? Aiden has a disorder called Satyriasis, what is Satyriasis? Satyriasis is an addiction to sex. You may know the addiction of sex known as nymphomania, but it differs between men and women. Any who, back to our friend Aiden. Aiden and his girlfriend "Porsche" (Please, tell me, does that scream stripper to you?) are active, sexually. So, this is where the story gets funny and very NSFW. So, haha, every Monday is what they called Masturbation Monday. Okay, that alone is hilarious to me. Aiden came in at 6 am, about 6-7 hours after he experienced his trauma. He received his trauma from his couch. He gave details... but I just can't relay them... it's very TOO much information for our ears. But... whenever you sit on someone's couch, always keep in mind what was between those cushions. Aiden decided to go further in discussion to tell us about how they have a different day for different fetishes. After he was booked for surgery, he was also booked for psychological counseling.

Tick, Tick, Tick, Goes the Bomb

I think probably one of my favorite things to see in the emergency room is an appendix patient. I love the surgery and the emergency care we give a person who has appendicitis. Although appendicitis is extremely dangerous, if you come soon enough, there is no problem. The appendix is a ticking little bomb within your lower abdomen... you are just waiting for the little thing to explode.

Imagine "Michelle" a 32-year-old-woman who is rushed into the emergency room due to complaints of abdominal pains. She arrived with a severe case of appendicitis where her appendix burst on our watch. The problem with a burst appendix is that it releases toxins into your blood stream. This release of toxins can be deadly, but if you are under care, you are safe. We performed an appendectomy and put Michelle on an IV of an anti-biotic. She's resting now, safe and sound.

Today I visited Paul again; he was in a much happier mood. He wouldn't tell me why he was so happy but he said he had things straightened out for himself. He said that he has left himself a legacy and that there will not be a problem with his death anymore. He told me he has now accepted death and the fact that it has to inevitably come at sometime in life. Although he was happy, he was ultimately fragile. He has become very pale and bed ridden. The poor guy is coming close and I just can't watch.

I Bet You Would Like to Undress Me

I dragged myself from my warm and comfortable bed this morning to go to work. I hate working every single day of the week because there is going to be at least one day I'm going to have a hangover. Thankfully, I didn't have one this morning, just a severe headache. I want some free time in my schedule, but then, I don't as well. I'm very indecisive when it comes to work. Today was a very bland day there was nothing good today. It was a day filled with broken bones and cold suffers. Dr.Maynard has a predilection for broken bones, as do I, because setting bones is so much fun.
Tonight I'm all alone, Caleigh is going to spend the night at her parent's house, and she’s going to come to my apartment in the afternoon. She has been high off her ass lately; the painkillers make her so stupid. It's mean, but she becomes a stereotype with those painkillers. She doesn't know what is going on in the world, and it is hilarious. To her right now, those pain pills are a panacea; but in all reality, for me they are poison.

So, today, I was eyed by a patient in the hospital. It’s reassuring when people double take when they see you. Makes you feel good about yourself, and when you get a number, you feel even better. I'm not going to call, because I'm not interested, but still... makes me feel good.

Ten Rounds with Jose Cuervo

Finally Saturday is here (and gone), too bad that Caleigh was in bad shape, I really wanted to go out tonight. It doesn't matter; I had an amazing time right at home.

So today I didn't have to intern, and I worked my normal job. I saw my long lost friend Paul. He is doing all right - he seems to be down. I spent a good amount of time in his room talking. He was concerned about Caleigh and now he wants to meet her; I told him that he would after she improves a little. Today our friend Allan, wait, do you remember Allan? The homeless guy? He came back for that nice warm bed and those free hot meals. He drank and smoked away all that change you guys left him in his coffee cup. He also racked up a phone bill when he called long distance; he's just checking to see how his buddies are doing on the eastern side (they finally did something right).

Now, in mi casa... we had our own little party... too bad I was the only one who could drink! I chugged that bottle as if tomorrow was never going to come! (I exaggerate excessively, I'm writing in my blog... I'm not that shitfaced!)

And after nine rounds with Jose Cuervo
They were counting me out and I was about to give in
Then after ten rounds with Jose Cuervo, I lost count and started counting again.

One round with Jose Cuervo... two rounds with Jose Cuervo... actually, I just love that song. I really had some martinis. I had a nicely stocked bar to make myself everything from apple to cape! It drove Caleigh crazy, but the foreplay was intense! After a long night of gentle fun, I'm logging out by blogging it up. Caleigh is sleeping right now and that comfortable and oh so very warm bed is screaming my name!

Blah. It's Friday.

Today has been a rather good day, to express my feelings in the least bit. Caleigh was discharged today, and she has a "clean" bill of health... sort of. She is completely fine except for those "few" injuries. She is staying at my apartment for at least the weekend. She is going to rest it up and relax; right now, everything hurts for her.

Today I returned to work for a long day at the emergency room. I continued my section on trauma, and I completed my first Friday as well. We were booked solid today; we had patients left and right. There were so many patients and so little doctors; the emergency room was in bad shape. As an intern doctor, we are not allowed to assist patients ourselves, only with our resident or attending physician.

Since I'm tired, I'm just going to share with you the one interesting story that we had tonight. There was a father who was about 53 named "Tom", and his son who was 23 named "John" who got into an intense argument. John despised his father and vice versa. To be concise, John shot his father in the thigh with a pistol and his father stabbed him in the abdomen. Talk about the drama in the family! They both arrived (all buddy buddy again, let me add) but both went away with the cuffs. The hospital is located DEAD SMACK in the middle of the ghetto, and I was told they get all the crazy admits from them.

I Kissed You in a Style that Clark Gable Would Have Admired

I did not work today in the emergency room, but spent the day with Caleigh. She’s doing fine now, she looks horrible though. She looks worse than she actually is doing. She has a large cut on her right cheek, which was stitched up, and her whole chest is bruised. She fractured her left ankle and sprained her wrist. When I was actually able to see her, when she was conscious, she cried. I felt like a horrible person. I kissed her…I kissed her like never before. Then, I met her parents; let me tell you... bitchy mother. Her mother is the mother that every boyfriend or fiancé fears. She’s nice, but she has that... that flare... to her personality. The one that you know if you do one thing wrong, it's your head on the chopping block. Her dad is pretty chill, laid back... I don't think he loves her mom anymore; he gives me that impression. Oh by the way -- remember when I said she was being short? Yeah, well... guess who just started their period? Ha, so called that one. I just got back home, I'm going to sleep here tonight, and she is freaking out about me missing work. She doesn't understand that I'm not allowed to work until she leaves the hospital. I'm in love with her. I wasn't going to even post tonight, but I just laid there in my bed, and she is all I can think about. All I could think of was when I kissed her in a style that Clark Gable would have admired. I'm going to actually attempt bed now... but first, did you notice? No quotation marks, I love her. I'm not lying.

There's Fog on the Windows

I'm not quite sure where to start with today. However, I'm going to tell it to you like a story, and I'm going to try to emphasize on details. Some small details before I start my story - I worked 6-9 in the emergency room as a tech, and then moved on to the other hospital to do my intern work.

The emergency room is quiet; there are no children crying, no people yelling, and no chatting of the patients and staff. I walk up to the psychiatric unit (although I just started today with trauma) because the emergency room is empty. Within five minutes, my pager starts to vibrate violently on my scrubs. I picked up the pager with the message 1ER 123A sprawled across the screen. It means that there is an emergency on Floor 1, in the Emergency Room, in Room 123A. They only page in moments of dire emergencies. So with all my energy, I rush to room 123A, and that is when my heart sunk. I could feel everything slow down and my heart beat from within my throat. There, on the stretcher laid Caleigh. It was about 12:45 and I figured she had blown me off for lunch... but no... Caleigh was in car accident. She laid there, unconscious, while being aided by a bunch of nurses and doctors; she was covered in blood. In addition, that’s about all I could physically see. I tried to help her, but I was escorted from the room. You are not allowed to help family or friends when they are admitted to the hospital. About five hours later, she was stabilized and was completely fine. Caleigh + trees = not friends. She should be okay... no broken bones, just a few hard bruises and some cuts and scrapes. It took forever to have her stabilize because of her inability to contain consciousness. I'll have some more details later, I'm going back to the hospital for the night.

The Atmospheric Pressure's Calling for Rain

Today was another interesting day with Paul. It was interesting, but depressing. He is starting to break down from his illness... he speaks as if every sentence was his last. His brightness was faded and his constant happiness has run dull. Despite his sadness, I continue to act the same. My relationship with Paul is like a father-son one, and I'm actually scared for him. One of the things they emphasized the most in training was not to create a personal bond, but there is a point where you just don't care. All Paul talked about today was how the world will be better off without him, and trust me... it was hard to convince him otherwise. I'm not the saying the world will be better off without him, but how do you reassure someone that they are important? It's hard.

So, I would to introduce you to "Mike", "Josh", "Timothy", and "Megan". So do you know what Mike, Josh, Timothy, and Megan all have in common? They are all one person; Mike has three known identities, but oncall residents and interns claim more. I think it is amazing how in-depth these characters get; they each have a little microcosm of which they live in!
Josh - Josh is a paraplegic, who lost all motor functions due to a car accident. When Josh takes the personality of Mike, he literally cannot move his limbs. His mind is wandering and his voice can barely catch up. His voice is deeper and raspier than his normal voice.
Timothy - Timothy was born and raised in Austin, Texas. His father is a businessman and his mother is a housewife. Timothy just finished graduate school and now has a masters in secondary education. His voice is much more feminine and more emphasis when he speaks.
Megan - Megan is a college student from North Dakota, who is majoring in business. S/he is currently working for an accounting firm that is respectable on Wall Street - or so she says. His/her voice is very high pitched and with a hollow laugh.
Finally, we have Mike, the real character. Mike is a high school dropout, who currently lives with his mother. Mike speaks with a natural lisp and suffers from bipolar disorder. He was court ordered a six-month stay, and he still hasn't improved.
That is basically my day as an intern... I spent it all with Mike, Josh, Timothy, and Megan. It's truly remarkable.

On the contrary to work, I feel as if a storm is coming between Caleigh and I; I'm not sure why, but she seems to be acting somewhat short with me. I hope it isn't the lifestyle thing, but she said she was going to talk to me tonight since basically the only time I get to really see her is late at night and on the weekends. I'm counting down to Saturday - I have almost no work! I think it actually might just be Caleigh's time of month... the 'fun' hasn't really been around lately.

Paging Doctor Baxter

Today was possibly the best and most exciting day of my life. I worked early this morning from 6- 8 in the emergency room. It was a slow two hours mostly because I was dying to start my internship. I spent my two hours with Paul in the emergency room; he was doing well today. I beat him in monopoly, go me! (I think he let me win). After my two hours were up, I went to a hospital that was about a forty-five minute drive from where I was. I had orientation from 10 - 3. That was really boring; we had to go over procedures, rules, and information regarding the hospital... nothing really new to me. After that, I met my resident and attending doctors, and from there I started my clinical. As an emergency doctor, you must be able to cover each branch of medicine. Guess where I started today? No, not OB-GYN...I'm not that lucky. I started in psych. I met the attending psychiatrist Dr. Gao. So today, with the aid of Dr.Gao, I saw all the psych consults. Holy Shit. I don't think I've seen as many people before for psych. The hospital, having the largest psychiatric unit in the area, consults over 75 people a day. Dr.Gao and I had a nice chat about psychiatry and he is going to bring me to unit tomorrow. I'm going to meet, interview, and assess a Multiple Personality Disorder (also known as Dissociative Identity Disorder) patient tomorrow, I'm excited.

Right now, it's 12:05... And I'm heading over to Caleigh's apartment for the night. I love her bed, it’s so comfortable... but she is the one who makes it very comfortable, if you know what I mean.

In Every Circle of Friends, There's A Whore...

(You know... the one who flirts, and does a little more?) Well, that would be Mandy. Who is Mandy? Amanda, my "Ex" is now sleeping around with just about every guy my age at my work. In my opinion, as well as CIWWAF, jealousy's the cousin, the cousin of greed. She wants to make me jealous... I'm not, sorry babe. I gave Amanda the nickname Mandy because it's more fitting for her; doesn't it remind you of a stripper? Ha, it's so true because that’s exactly how she’s acting. I love how she left me, and now she craves me more than ever.

On the contrary, let me tell you about dropping jaws. The ball was fantastic; we had a really good time. The food was amazing; I had Filet Mignon, while Caleigh had a delicious chicken dish. The night was really nice; we were amongst the youngest couple there. We danced, we ate, we socialized... I felt part of the Hollywood scene!

Now, to catch up on my long, long day: I did not work the emergency room today; I was ordered one-on-one assistance with Paul, who coded again. After reading his chart, I found out he coded again last night for heart problems. Paul is starting to really bad... and it seriously is taking a toll on me. I see Paul every single day to make sure he is doing good and see how he is being treated. He's told me so many stories I want to write a book. His stories are so interesting they deserve to be bound. Any who, Paul's full diagnosis has come back from the lab. His diagnosis has been confirmed from further tests and radiology reports. Paul has lung cancer as a complication of Agent Orange poisoning. The blood deficiency has been the sole reason for his heart problems, another complication of Agent Orange. He is been given a two week life expectancy. :( Today with Paul was not boring, but just long. I played a couple games of scrabble with him, the winning and losing was mixed. I feel so bad for Paul; he is going to die alone. He has no one there for him and he is going to die with love from no one. He has no family alive... the poor guy is so alone. I have taken his advice so true to heart. I can still hear his raspy voice in the emergency room: Don't waste your time with work, pursue woman instead. Still, when I think about it, all I can hear is the song lyrical lies.

I'm headed to bed now; I have a huge and long day tomorrow. I might have to post later tomorrow... I start my new job. Intern, ahem... Doctor Baxter might I add. I hope I can still be there for Paul though; he needs some type of family in his state.

Up in Flames

I'm writing this post early because I've forgot to tell you guys for the past week that tonight I'm attending a benefit ball. The private dinner (at a whopping $250 a plate) is going to be nice. We are going to be dressed in formal attire. I'm sporting a black pinstripe tuxedo compliment of Armani, while Caleigh is sporting a long and sleek silk dress from Luis Vuitton. The dinner is in benefit for AIDS research.

Now, my day in the E.R.: A fairly large fire broke out in an apartment building. It was horrible, we had 10 admits for critical burns. There are at least three people with burns covering 80% of their body. The worst thing, four of them is children. Two children and and one man went into hypovolemic shock. Hypovolemic shock is when there is large decrease in blood volume and blood plasma. This thirst, or need for blood is caused when the patient is burned. When you are burned your capillaries began to become porous and leak, thus leaking blood. Each patient needed both intravenous fluids and assisted breathing. Those with the severe burns (the two children and man) had blood transfusions. Dr. Maynard, the on call physician told me something pretty cool today: Did you know that you can use coconut juice as blood plasma? The juice can mimic blood plasma because it’s easily absorbed and does not dtestroy red blood cells. Cool, eh?

Watch Those Jaws D R O P

I love work, but I love Saturdays. The day seems to go by fast, and I want to enjoy a break. Everything in my life is fast paced and my afternoon/night off makes lets reality hit me. I'm not going to lie; I'm a pretty attractive guy. I'm not something you write home about, but I have confidence in myself. Do you find that attractive? I hope so. I have received a few emails from some blog readers asking me to describe myself because I have barely described what I look like. Feel free to comment here, I have open comments so you don't have to register, just please don't comment anonymously, I like some personality! Anyways, I'm about 6 ft tall; I have a swimmer's body tone, and nicely tanned skin. I have natural brown/blonde hair, short and well kept. I have very lustrously lime eyes; they scream warmth while my blunt personality screams cold. I have one tattoo on the back of my shoulder of a caduceus:


Then I have one tattoo around my upper right arm of a tribal band. Well, that’s basically everything about me.


Now, about those dropping jaws... I'm a pretty stylish guy; I want to look the best because I want to be the best. Nothing like a little self-centered attitude, right? Because I didn't grow up with all the things I wish I had, I work hard to get them for myself. I'll pay the extra few bucks, and girls don't lie. You like it when a guy walks into a club rocking Emporio. I love the high-class but I love the prep class too. I crashed at Caleigh's apartment last night; let me tell you... wicked nice. Very contemporary and modern styled, sleek and attractive. Her wardrobe consists of punky clothing as well as preppy. I think she looks the sexiest in the morning. Her hair all messy, wearing my boxers and shirt... with her mascara smudged around her eyes. I need to breathe! She is going to spend the night at my apartment tonight and we are going to have a good time. I got out at four, and she'll be over here soon. And again, about those dropping jaws... She came into work at lunchtime to eat lunch with me, talk about turning heads, ha! They are j e a l o u s.

PAUL coded today. He had a minor heart attack; he was brought back to the emergency room where he chilled for a bit until he was declared stable to return upstairs. He is such a nice guy; I hate to see him in so much pain. I bought him some good food because he complained about how much hospital food sucked. I got him wedding soup; he said it was his favourite. Paul hasn't had any visitors at all. I'm afraid to live a life like Paul's. I want to have a family and be happy... I want to enjoy the wonders of children and marriage. Paul told me when he had the love of his life... but left it all behind for the army.

There was only one significant case in the emergency room today, and it was a stab victim... who just barely made it. "Jim" a 16-year-old was stabbed directly in the stomach area, where his stomach releases its gastric acid (hydrochloric acid) into his body. A person with this condition only has about 30 minutes before the acid literally eats away all the internal organs. Thankfully, he was stabbed in a public place where he was discovered and brought to us. He is undergoing surgery tonight, but he is looking in good shape. You are seriously not safe in the city at 16, better yet even 18. Poor kid mugged for the little change he has, now probably a stolen identity... so vulnerable.

Cali is walking in through the door, so I'm going to have to run... my heart has already started to pound; her lips are like morphine.

I'm in the Business of Misery

So, let us take it from the top. Amanda came back to me today looking for some fun. Although appealing, I don't think so. I tried to talk to her about her decision, she must face the consquences. She called me cold... told me everyone makes bad choices, I told her to learn from it. I agree with her, I'm cold, I have no feelings... I'm a medical student... we have no feelings, deal with it. Just because you wanted to sleep around and just got denied, don't bitch. Caleigh, on the other hand... damn. I'll finish my lyrics with shes got a body like an hourglass. That one stand stand grew into something so much more. It has turned into a little obssession... she makes me feel different, it's hard to explain. Her sexy punky style is new to me, but damn...shes sexy. Her long platnium hair extends past her shoulders, with jet black streaks that captivates you. When I look into her bright blue eyes, they scream FUCK ME. It's a bit graphic, I know... but its a new feeling for the both of us. She'll wear a sexy tight tee-shirt with a band name slashed across the front of it, and a nice short skirt (short enough not to be declared a whore). She has one piercing that drives me crazy for her, it's on the right side of have bottom lip. Oh god does it make life fun. I'm attracted, let's see if I can fall in love with her personality.

While we are speaking of the business of misery, today has been a day of losses. We had another case of an anyuerism (this time of the brain) , but when she arrived to the hospital she was already pronounced dead. We had three drug-related deaths because of tainted heroin. The heroin is laced with a drug called Fentanyl. Fentanyl is a narcotic pain killer, its extremely powerful and extremely addictive. Mixing both the most dangerous drug and one of the most dangerous prescription drugs is not a good idea. Abusers of Fentanyl suffer from respitory problems which inevitably lead to their death.

Apart from the druggies, we had "Lois" a 42-year-old woman admitted for breaking seven bones. She broke both of her radiuses, both femurs, a vertabre, and her pelvis. Do you know how Lois broke all these bones? She fell off of her roof... onto her concrete patio. What was Lois doing on her roof? She claims she was adjusting her satellite. I think one of the most fun things to do in the emergency is help set bones. Its so painful for the patient but the feeling of shifting a bone back into place is awesome. Poor Lois has a long road to recovery.

The last significant patient was "Jasmine" who is an 18-year-old girl who was brought in because she poked herself in the eye with her eyeliner. Let me tell you, this was night a pretty sight. GIRLS, DO NOT DO YOUR MAKEUP IN THE CAR, PLEASE. The eyeliner pencil was lodged literally in her eye, we had to remove it and address the wound. She then had to be sent away for visual eye surgery where she will hopefully be able to see again. The damage to her eye wasn't extreme, she'll probably end up with some scarring.

It was a pretty busy day, I mean it's not that much work, especially when I'm in the Business of Misery.

Dark Blue, Dark Blue

Have you ever been alone in a crowded room? Working in the hospital is like suffering from bipolar disorder. You have continual sessions of ups and downs. Monday we lost Emily, yesterday we saved Phil, and today, well, was a boring old day at the Emergency Room. Probably during my eight hours of work today, the only extreme thing was a broken pelvis. Today is Wednesday, weird. We have a saying: Slow Wednesday, expect a weekend rush. If you remember last week, I told you that we usually always have a busy Wednesday. I also expect a fast day tomorrow. I start my rounds as an intern next Monday, so I'll be leaving this hospital at night, I'll only be working in the morning. I'm actually quite depressed about it, but I'll have more free time! My classes will be my interning period now that the information sessions are over.

Leaving work at an early time of 6 PM, I was able to take Caleigh out for dinner. My one night stand has evolved into a small little relationship. I like little relationships that don't get big, I don't want commitments, I don't have time for them. Commitments are for simpletons... people who don't have a workload to manage. I can't promise dinner every night, a warm bed to share, or even a phone call every day. There are nights I don't eat dinner, or hop into a freezing cold bed, or not talk to anyone for a week. I hope she can understand, if not... I'm sure I can find someone. Any who, dinner was good, I love Cordon Bleu!

Early to bed for me tonight!

Beating Heart Baby.

I worked a long, exhausting night. I worked from 4Pm - 11 PM; it was a shift from heaven. Usually, when I tell you things were slow and boring... it doesn’t mean that we were sitting around waiting for a case to come in, but we were stuck with the usual bump and scrape check out. I feel bad saying that we had a shift from heaven because we had a bunch of admits, but I love working and helping those in need.

It was no more than thirty minutes after I walked into the door when we had a code blue on arrival. When there is a code blue on arrival, the hospital is in chaos. Each department sends a doctor, nurse, or technician to the emergency room. Then, we have an established plan of action for the incoming patient. In the case of cardiac arrest, cardiac involvement, the representative from that department would take control of the situation. If it relates to a different department, that person is in control of the situation. The representative from the psychiatric unit is responsible for the psychiatric well-being of the family members. Together, the hospital creates a respectable and strong team. This code has been a structure for hundreds of hospitals across the country.

Tonight's case was a 32-year-old man whom we called "Phil". Phil is 5'10", weighing in at 150lbs., Phil is skinny, but... he had atherosclerosis. Atherosclerosis is the hardening of arteries; it is caused by buildup of fats and cholesterol. Once the fat and cholesterol build up the arteries began, expand out the side, thus causing a thoracic aortic aneurysm. The aorta is the largest artery in your body and the most important; an aneurysm on this artery is not good. His artery first began to leak within him. He was brought in by ambulance for excessive chest and back pain. Once he arrived, we gave him immediate chest x-rays which vaguely indicated that there was a leaking aneurysm (massive 7 centimeter one, we find out later). Before our eyes, Phil went unconscious as he flat-lined. With the hospital's cardiologist on hand we had to physically go into his chest to first stop the bleeding aneurysm. Talk about an adrenaline rush. Here we are, twenty hospital workers frantically trying to save one man from death. At this moment, the world seemed to slow. His artery was carefully stitched with the aid of the oncall surgeon until we could safely transport him to an operating room. Once in the operating room he was in a long procedure were a synthetic fabric was inserted to replace the artery wall. A M A Z I N G. Phil is safe and sound now in the recovery unit :)

The other cases are not as interesting as this one... I couldn't believe the people in the emergency room. We all did fantastic and Phil lived. My hours at the hospital are going to be cut soon. I'm going to be working in another hospital soon for school, where I will be attending as an intern. I'm excited; you can call me Doctor Baxter!

I'm going to crash now, night!

3:32 PM

Today has been a horrible day. Between classes and work today was horrible. There are a number of things that go on in this world that I hate, and it seemed that they all appeared today.


1.) I hate drug addicts. I feel remorse for them to the fact that they can't control their urges to put down a needle or a pipe. But when we admit them to the point that they are clean, free of withdrawal... only to come back higher than Everest... it bugs me. Here we are, rushing to the very second to bring your sorry ass back to life, only for you to go back and shoot it up. We had a man come into day, "Brian", for his fourth detox in three weeks. I felt bad for Brian when he first over dosed and came in for help. He cried and cried saying he needed help... and that’s what we do... help. But come on Brian, this is the third time you've come in crying. Inevitably, we had to send him away for some more in-depth psychological help.


2.) I hate stuck up people... people who think they are so much better than everyone else. I hate it when you are trying to assess someone during an emergency they find it necessary to complain that haven't seen anyone because they have a cough that won't go away. You are not the only one with a problem! If we based the emergency room on a first come first served basis, there would be so many deaths. Suck it up and wait!


3.) I hate death. There is nothing I hate more than we lose a patient. We lost three people today, and it is the hardest thing to overcome. You know what’s worse than a regular 'ol death? When it’s a child... that makes it even harder. If you have ever seen someone die, or have seen a dead body, it is a weird experience. First, you don't feel as if the person who is lying before you a person anymore, as if you can sense their soul moving on. "Emily", the six-year-old girl who died on our table at 3:32 PM today, was the hardest death I had ever witnessed. Emily was beaten by her father, the poor girl had a whole life to experience, but it was cut short by an asshole. Emily came in accompanied by her pathetic, crying, and drunk father. The front of her yellow daisy sundress was covered in blood; for the past hour, she was vomiting blood. By the time we could come to her aide her symptoms were extreme. She could barely keep her eyes open and her pulse was extremely low. Her heart slowly began to fail... but not even the best drugs on the market or the power of the defibrillator could keep her heart from failing. God Bless you Emily. I don't think I could have been happier today when he was arrested.

4.) I also hate more death. We lost an elderly man today to a stroke, and we lost a middle-aged woman to a car accident. I really hate death, and I really feel bad for the families who have to feel the pain of losing someone they love.

On the contrary...
I met with Cali yesterday and we had a good time, it turns out we have a lot in common. It’s weird, our favourite book: The Winter of Our Discontent by Steinbeck, our favourite colour: green (she does have beautiful green eyes), and drink: delicious coffee. I drink seven cups of coffee a day, it wouldn't surprise me if 1/3 of my budget goes towards coffee, it’s so expensive at the hospital.

I went up to Paul's room today and we had a nice chat for about an hour. Paul told me about his life, what a poor guy. He started his own company that dealt with stocks. He had quite a respectable business until he was forced to close down because he couldn't handle his fast aging and the demands of the business. He also told me about war; he talked about his best friend, who is listed on the Vietnam Memorial in Washington. Do you think it’s worse to have a friend die before you, and say goodbye... or die without you and not be able to say goodbye? Paul was there when his friend died, but he says he wishes he wasn't. He wants to be able to remember the good times, not his lifeless body. When I told him, I would want to say goodbye he laughed. They know you are going to miss them, Beau. They know it’s not going to be easy, and they know they are going to be missed. What is the point of putting yourself through that mess? I suppose he's right... who wants to go through that emotional strain?

Nothing Like a One Night Stand

There is nothing like a one night stand. The best thing about a one night stand, I think, is the fact that it costs you nothing, while a hooker is some big bucks there. Not to mention the perfume is a little better. A hooker is dirty, and well, the one night stand has a better chance of being clean haha. I suppose it’s a good thing I have standards. I met a girl last night, about the age of 24, at a local bar. Her name is Caleigh, but I'll spell it as Cali from now on because that’s how she signs it. I find it ironic that we live in California and that is how she signs her name. She is actually damn beautiful… she left me her number. I can't really remember that much from the night except how provocative she looked in my tank top and the fact my wallet was short 50 bucks from all the drinks I bought us (Well... I hope that’s where the money went!).

Today wasn't bad; I worked early 5:30 until 11. The morning is always the most boring because there is barely anyone who comes in. However, today we had only one good case that was interesting. A woman, "Josephine" came in with an abdominal laceration. She had quite a lot of blood loss and we were worried whether she'd go into shock. Her daughter told us that she impaled herself with a kitchen knife when she slipped on a wet floor. Ladies and gentlemen: don’t put away dishes after you mopped the floor. Thankfully, no internal organs were damaged; there was minor surgery for the muscle tissue and some nice stitches to fix up the cut. She'll have a nice scar to share with her grandchildren.

I took another trip to Paul again today; I only had 15 minutes to speak with him after work because he was due for a colonoscopy. He told me that he’s been in more pain lately, I feel bad for him. I talked to his nurses and ordered them to give him extra care. I've only known Paul for two days but he feels like a best friend to me. Our short, but meaningful conversations are like small blasts from the past, and a good confession source. It's so easy to be captivated into a story of how life seemed so much simpler, easy, and fun than today.

I'm leaving in about 20 minutes to catch up with Cali again. We are going to go out to dinner to meet each other this time. It should be interesting, but I'll fill you in tomorrow.

Crashing and Burning

Today was a little busy, but not too much. The weekends are my favourite because I work from 7 AM to 4 PM and I have the whole night to do whatever I want. Usually I'll go to the bar with some people from work, or maybe I'll catch up on studying, or even work on that long forgotten paper. There were no awesome exciting trauma patients today, which is both good and bad. It's good because no one was critically hurt and bad because it means the E.R. was boring and there was no rush. When you work in the Emergency Room, you always feel an Adrenaline rush. Someone is in trouble and you need to save him or her, so in this stage of excitement your brain tells your adrenal gland to release Epinephrine, or what we call Adrenaline. It makes your heart beat so hard, and gives you that floating feeling. You can refer to me as an Adrenaline junkie. I don't care. I'm happy that my Adrenaline rush comes from helping people and not shoplifting or gambling (Who does that help?).

Today on my lunch break I went up and visited Paul, he was quite pleased to get some company. Unfortunately, Paul has no family left and has no visitors. I sat and talked to Paul about life. He told me all about his childhood and his family. Unfortunately, my 30-minute lunch wasn't enough to hear about it completely, I returned to the Emergency room for three and a half hours of continual boring medical treatments.

So, I got home at about 4:15ish, to find a message on my answering machine from Amanda. She told me that she couldn't see me anymore because I was too much into school, work obsessed, and I didn't give her enough time. She told me she was done and she was moving on to someone who could give her the attention she deserved. I didn't care. Well, I did, sort of. I wanted to keep my pledge that Paul had brainwashed into me... from his words of wisdom. However, I didn't have the chance to carry out my pledge, I feel bad about it. I called her back and tried to negotiate, but it was too late. Therefore, I'm hitting the bar tonight.

F*cking Fridays

You say Thank God it's Friday, I say F*ck, It's Friday. Fridays are by far the busiest day in the week. It seems as if everyone is rushing into the hospital for his or her all-inclusive stay. The hospital food sucks -- for patients, for us employees it freekin' rocks. They put time and effort into our food, not the mass-produced patient crap.

So today walked in "Allan", a 46-year-old homeless man complaining of abdominal pains. You are about to become best friends with Allan because he comes in weekly. Allan has probably cost the hospital over a hundred thousand dollars in free medical treatment. Allan is a nice man, but he ruins the free medical care for everyone who really needs it. He comes in on the weekends or cold nights because there’s a warm bed, hot food, and free cable. Not to mention since Allan’s real abdominal pain - where he was stabbed by another homeless man for food and change - he became addicted to pain killers.

At around 7:30 PM, a 55-year-old man named "Paul" came in by ambulance. The man was hollering as the paramedics brought his stretcher into the hospital wing. I rushed over to the man in the stretcher and his hollering ceased. He stared at me in my white jacket, my tan and thin complexion and my blonde hair. He told me I looked just like him when he was my age. I placed two fingers on his wrist and took his pulse; his heart was racing but starting to slow. We brought him into the west wing, where I studied his chart curiously. The paramedic had scrawled onto the chat that he was suffering from complications of Agent Orange. Paul was a Vietnam Veteran. Paul was in no mortal danger but in pain, I sat with him and talked with him. I need vaguely what Agent Orange was, but he sat down and filled me in with more information. Agent Orange was an herbicide that the United States used to spray over the forests and vegetation in Vietnam. To be concise, it's an extremely toxic chemical and our soldiers slept and lived next to these large barrels of these chemicals. Paul grabbed my white coat and pulled me close. Don't waste time with work he told me. Pursue woman instead, it was my biggest mistake. I was speechless, I didn't have a clue what to say, and Paul knew this. Life is short. He added. Again, I was speechless, I felt as though he was listening to my iPod with me before I came into work.

An old man gave me a tip he said
"Don't waste your time with politics" he said
"Just chase skirts instead"
"Life is too short, and you're almost dead" he said
"I met a woman once, I gave her my best shot"
"But never did I talk and talk and talk"
"If I had her back, I'd be as real as my age"
"I so don't blame them, I wouldn't do the same"
"But I can blame them, I'd sing her this"
- Lyrical Lies by Cute is What We Aim For

So, from now on I pledge to give woman more respect than I give them now. Paul's words are so bone chilling that I can't stop thinking about what he said. On the medical side of Paul, he was admitted for Chloracne, one of the symptoms of Agent Orange exposure. We admitted him so he can undergo more tests to see if Agent Orange has any other effects on him. I worked until 11:30 tonight, and once the Friday night rush went slow, I spent my time with Paul. There is so much to learn from older people.

I'm Cold and That's the Reason

Happy Valentine’s Day. Today I only had class; I took the day off work. So I did go out to dinner with Amanda, I told her "I loved her", and we had a nice dinner. If you haven't noticed, when I put something in quotations, I'm usually lying. Sometimes, I feel obligated to lie... most of the time they are white lies... but unfortunately, there are a few bad lies in there. My excuse: I'm cold. I'm like the Grinch, with a little heart; however, I can sympathize. I feel pain, I "feel" (there I go lying again...) love and I've certainly felt hate. Nevertheless, the night was actually enjoyable. I did kiss Amanda and meant it (hence no quotations), and actually, the food was pretty damn good.

Wicked Wednesdays

For some reason, it always seems that Wednesday is always busy. As though Monday and Tuesday are just relaxation days, Wednesday a big rush, Thursday another relaxation period... and then Friday with the finale. It's not like there was a mascal, but merely just so many people coming in for different reasons. There is nothing that I hate more than when someone comes in with the common cold; it’s a waste of my time. I can understand if there were complications with a cold, but seriously... if the cold drags on... take some damn medicine.

Probably the most interesting character that came in today was "Fred". A 27-year-old man suffering from severe cases of Schizophrenia. Apparently, he ceased consumption of his medicine. In the emergency room, we have a routine for the mentally ill. We perform an evaluation, if his insurance wants to perform their own they can, we may admit him to our hospital, or send him to another. What was the reason for Fred to come to our hospital? To be concise, He went out of control. He suffered from a sub-group of Schizophrenia called Paranoia Schizophrenia. Fred tried to kill his neighbor in the effect that he believed his neighbor was spying on him. The police were outside his room, but just looking at Fred I could tell he had some issues. He was sweating profusely; he rocked in his seat back and forth, and couldn't stop biting his fingernails. I could only feel sympathy for Fred; he can't control his thoughts or actions. Well, it turned out, that his neighbor glanced over to Fred and gave him a wave. We admitted Fred, and Fred is back on his medication, Fred is happy.

On the contrary, I have dinner reservations for tomorrow at an upscale restaurant in town. We'll see how well dinner goes with Amanda. I haven't seen in her a week, but I "hope" it doesn't thwart our dinner plans… they were expensive.

Coax Me

Coax:
koʊs [kohks]

–verb (used with object)

1. to attempt to influence by gentle persuasion, flattery, etc.

So you may have wondered why I have titled my blog "Drop your Jaw & Coax Me". This is a line from one of favourite songs... and I feel as though it is so fitting. The line sounds so dirty as if it was some type of sexual innuendo, but in reality, it merely means to sweet talk me. This is my life; do you know how many people coax me into a study group? How many times have girls coaxed me into some cheap Saturday-night-quickie? Woman of the world - I ask you a favor. Spend some money on some good perfume, not the cheap shit from the dollar store. However, the line "Drop your jaw and coax me" represents my life. Actually, the whole song "There's A Class for this" represents my life. The main chorus constantly sings, "Drama doesn't follow me, it rides on my back". Do you know how many medical school students love the drama? My god, shoot me now!
On the contrary, today was an average day. The emergency room wasn't any different... and the people still filed in. I arranged for a day off work Thursday (yes I took a personal day!) I'm going to take my "girlfriend" out for Valentine’s Day; we'll see how it works. I'm not the romantic type (football in high school completely removed it from me).

Your First Day (In My Shoes)

I was ripped from my dreams at about 4:30 AM this morning when I had to jump up to get ready for work. For the first fifteen minutes I slept while my alarm clock buzzed away; I knew I could sleep for another fifteen minutes without being late. I dragged myself out of bed and shut off the alarm, where I then collapsed in the shower. This is my daily morning routine. I'll lay at the bottom of my bathtub and let the hot water pour on me for about twenty minutes until I regained consciousness. After my shower I dried off to look in the foggy mirror, I notice everyday how my face has aged, god… I'm so vain. From the bathroom, I could hear my cell phone ring. I walked down the hall towards my bedroom until I could recognize the ringtone: it's the hospital. I move a bit more quick and as I reached for the phone, I could hear my pager buzz radically. I answered the phone and then went to my pager, which read "911". The voice on the phone was a recording: "Attention emergency room staff, we have a Code 5, assistance is required." This is when I regretted that I slept that extra fifteen minutes. I threw on my clothes and left.

I arrived at the hospital at approximately 5:15, ten minutes after the code was called. I jogged into the emergency room and went straight to work. This is when I couldn't believe my eyes. The emergency room is made up of four wings. We call it the north, south, east, and west wings. Since I'm located in the city... each wing contains about 25 beds. There is always three doctors on call and at least 10 emergency room technicians, along with about 15 or 20 nurses. The job market for medicine is failing; we only have 2 emergency doctors, 6 ER techs, and 16 nurses on staff. Every emergency, I'm called in for every emergency... I miss so much class because of people's lack of desire to be a doctor, tech, or nurse.

There were "mass causalities" (mascal for short). We had seven people admitted from an accident in suburbs... the morning commute is never pretty. Apparently, a woman lost control of her vehicle and slammed into two cars, which slammed into other cars. I immediately dropped my bag and began to help sort through the chaos. We had four people with apparent broken bones, one person in horrible shape that needed to be transferred to intensive care. The other two people were in moderate pain and needed to be checked out.

Since it’s against the law (HIPAA), and my own moral standards, I will not disclose names. However, I'll give you some names that I made up. “Sarah”, 24, had a compound fracture of her left elbow. Her blood loss was minimal but in severe pain. Having a medicine administering certification, I administered her painkillers until the orthopedic doctor could arrive. While we waited for Sarah to be seen, I moved so someone else. I took over for “Doctor Maynard”, whom was hooking up Will, 17, to an IV. Under orders, three nurses and I rushed Will to the third floor intensive care unit. After we left will we, rushed back to hear code blue east projected over the intercoms. The east wing was the entrance to the emergency room; a mother had just walked her daughter into the emergency room. Her face was swollen, her skin was red swollen, and she was barely breathing. I immediately noticed she was in anaphylactic shock. I grabbed the nearest nurse where bagged (put her under artificial breathing) and administered epinephrine. The epinephrine solution, given intravenously, gave her heart more power to beat, and more help to fight off the swelling. After she stabilized, I rushed off to assist Dr. Maynard with the other crash patients. I worked until 9:30, where I left to go to school until 5 PM. I then ate -fast food once again - and I returned to work. Thank god, it was a slow night.... I worked from 7 - 11. What a busy day. (I promise not to make all these posts this long.)

Let's Talk About Me

Apart from my "about me" page, I should probably fill you in a little about me. My "friends", or in more proper terms, colleagues, call me Beau, some BoBax. I'm a fourth year medical student on my way into the big world with an MD. I'm currently top of my class and most envied student. I work every day before and after my classes at a local hospital as an Emergency Room Technician. I make shit money for all the work and effort I put in, but the learning is worth the work; soon, I'll be the MD in the emergency room.

I'm a drop out business major. I quit business school when I was in undergrad; I learned
the value of medicine after my younger brother became ill. I dropped out of business in 2002, where I took up all the biology and science classes my college could offer. In order to graduate pre-medicine, I had to spend two summers full of courses to graduate with "my" pre-med class. I miss my childhood, where life was easy. I sit in a slummy apartment and wish I had the luxuries that I had as a child. I refuse to ask for help, I'm so self-centered in my sin of pride that I refuse to ask my family for money or help (that’s where my $200,000 + of debt from school comes in). I was born into a not-so-wealthy family; both of my parents are respected lawyers in our community.

Why do I have a blog? Well, that’s a good question. I have so many emergency room stories that I want to share... but I can't…there isn’t someone who I’d like share my stories with, so I chose you. Well... there are people, but I choose not share my stories with them. I'm what people would call a "player". But, I resent that. I have a problem with attachment; I never want to be too close. I can't stay with the same person for longer than week. Their consistent phone calls are too much for me to handle. Nevertheless, as time continues... you'll see what I mean.